I could do without the smooth jazz, though…

You know how when you go into Starbucks and there are those people working diligently on their laptops, and you’re like “who do they think they are, fricking Sarah Jessica Parker or something? Get a real job, douche.” What you may not realize, though, is that the neutral-colored backdrop of identical yuppies/hipsters actually encourages concentration, as I have found on more than one occasion. But what I did not realize until this week is that you can be one of those fuckers and also be cheap, because if you live close enough to one, Panera Bread has free hi-speed wireless. So screw you, Manhattan Starbucks/T-Mobile HotSpot autocracy and your XM radio and packaged sandwiches, this douche is goin suburban.

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  1. Absolutely. There’s a very nice mom&pop coffee shop where I live with free wireless…and it’s right across the street from a Starbucks. Eat it, Zeta Jones.

  2. That’s even better, although at Panera I maintain the neutral backdrop aspect, which is helpful.

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