All posts for the month February, 2006

Letter to the editor of Spin Magazine that I’m not going to send for self-protective hypocritical reasons

Dear Ms. Michel, First I would like to say that you are a very pretty lady, and that I would be surprised if your male interns actually manage to do any work. Second I would like to say that if you continue to put alternative-mainstream-so-indie-they’re-indistinguishable bands on the cover of your magazine, I will cancel [...]

So what if I do kinda like the new Harvey Danger album

I just got an email that said only “Moose (drums) will call you at noon on Friday.” At first I wondered if there was a scheduled drug deal that I’d forgotten about (I’m always forgetting to write them down), but then I remembered I’m doing a phone interview with a U.K. band that likes bloodletting [...]

Caution to future employers:

In the name of full disclosure, I’ve decided to issue this warning to any persons or organizations who may consider hiring me at some point in the future: I will be a loyal and hardworking employee, but there is a better than fair chance that at some point after hiring me, you will for any [...]

Rock the mic, eh

If you’re looking for a reason to get satellite radio, here’s one: it’s one of the only ways, unless you live some place like Buffalo and get the CBC, that you will suddently discover you are listening to a Canadian rap show. Not just a rap show coming from Canada, but a show playing exclusively [...]

Day Old’s Guide to Taxes, 2005

It’s that time of year again: all your W-2s have come in the mail and they’re sitting on your coffee table, taunting you, reminding you that the two months until tax day will be over sooner than you think. When will you have the time? Should you pay someone to do them? Where the hell [...]

‘Democracy’ is just a figure of speech, like ‘sustainable energy sources’

Call me a turrist, but seeing “The U.S. and Israel are discussing ways to destabilize the Palestinian government to produce a Hamas failure and new elections” as the lead story in the New York Times makes me a little itchy.

February of the Penguins

Holy sno-cones Batman, wouldja look at this blizzard. It was like 70 degrees three days ago, and now it’s like total Antarctica, like if I leave my house I might get sucked right in to a pile of snow and never come out. But there’s something weirdly gratifying about getting trapped in your house, so [...]

HAHAHAHAHAHA!! HA HA!!

The Attorney General said that Washington, Lincoln, Wilson, and Roosevelt had secret electronic surveillance programs! While testifying to the Senate Judiciary Committee! Hoo hoo hoo hoo-wee! And Jimmy Carter totally dissed the president at Coretta Scott King’s funeral! When Bush was sitting right behind him!! Oh, my sides. Thank god other people are coming up [...]

Kurt’s gone. I miss him.

As always, last night’s Cringe reading, hosted by the lovely, talented, and unsinkable Sarah Brown, was a pants-pissin’ hoot-n-holler. I hadn’t been in a while because of a cursed (to be read ‘curs-ed’, fyi) Wednesday night class last semester, so it was great to be back in the teenage-angsty fray. The awesome/sucky thing was that [...]